There are many people whom you will come across, during the course of your life, who will try to manipulate you. Everyone from your child or spouse, to your boss or a salesman. People manipulate because “they want what they want, when they want it!” They are looking out for their best interest, not yours. The truth is, we all attempt to manipulate others at some point in our lives, by playing on their emotions. It is the extent that people go to, in manipulating others, that becomes a problem in relationships. If it is a pervasive part in your interactions with someone, then you have a serious toxic problem that can hurt you emotionally.
The ones described below are 10 WARNING SIGNS that you are involved with a MANIPULATIVE PERSON. This means that someone is trying to exert undo influence or control over you, or is attempting to have a situation turn out the way they want it by using unfair, crooked or abusive behaviors.
These individuals may:
1. ASK A LOT OF QUESTIONS: This will help them to ascertain your strengths and vulnerabilities.
2. THEY LIE OR TWIST THE TRUTH: This helps them to get you to believe that they know the best outcome, and leaves you questioning yourself, and what you believe to be true.
3. THEY TALK FAST and THROW A TON OF INFORMATION AT YOU: This can cause you to be confused and just go along with what they say.
4. THEY BECOME AGGRESSIVE: Shouting or physical aggression can cause you to just do what they want because you feel intimidated, and just want the intimidation to stop.
5. THEY ARE OFTEN JUDGMENTAL AND TEND TO CRITICIZE: This may be done in an overt or more passive-aggressive way, which lowers your self-esteem and puts you at their mercy.
6. THEY BLAME YOU OR TRY TO MAKE YOU FEEL GUILTY: Never taking responsibility for their part in things, the manipulator tries to always make you feel THAT IT IS YOU who has done something wrong.
7. THEY USE DEROGATORY HUMOR OR SARCASM: This negative language undermines your feeling of safety, and leads you to feel “less than” in the relationship.
8. THEY MAY ISOLATE YOU FROM YOUR FRIENDS AND LOVED ONES: In this way they become the most important person in your world, and any concerns you may have about being manipulated doesn’t get shared with others, which might give you perspective.
9. THEY USE YOUR OWN WORDS AGAINST YOU: This is an attempt for you to see the manipulator as the victim in the relationship.
10. THEY MAKE THEIR PROBLEMS SEEM MORE IMPORTANT THAN YOURS: The ultimate sign that you are involved with a manipulative NARCISSIST!